ghosts & admissons

We are called to be sufficient but still to suffer want

Once again there has been an el chupacabra captured. This time in Texas, it had drunk the blood of like 80 chickens and was probably pretty sluggish. Typically these things are fast and if you get too close they can stun you with their googly eyes. Not so for this poor bastard, he got decapitated and then they stuck his head in a freezer. Sucky.

They’re gonna run some tests on it to see if it is in fact a chupacabra or just an ugly dog. Well guess what scientists? You can extract any DNA from it. El Chupacabras don’t get their strength from a cellular level; they get it from the devil, everyone knows that. So don’t be alarmed when your Petri dishes and microscopes get engulfed in flames. Satan’s work is a dangerous thing; and even in death it has a funny way of exacting vengeance.

Keep up the good fight chuppy…don’t let that no head thing get you down. They’ll get theirs and you can ram their bodies down the gaping hole in you neck as you lazily drift down the river Styx.

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As an addendum to that...El Chupacabras also don't require DNA because they don't breed. Each one is a unique creation of the Devil. Like a little, blood thirsty snowflake...each one's completely different. They are delivered full grown and only develop in their ferocity and disdain for humans.

posted by El Chupacabra @ 11:19 AM